We still prefer privatized naptimes.

You probably looked at this and thought ”finally!” That’s the appropriate reaction to a long-overdue innovation like this.

How many times have you thrown your arms in the air, flummoxed, lamenting that there is no sippy-cup technology for your adult libations? Probably a lot. We’re not judging you. We’ve been there.

But at long last, the grown-up sippy-cup has arrived. It’s real and it’s wonderful.

So you know what’s on the horizon, surely. We can anticipate grown-up blankets to accompany our mandatory, government-regulated naptimes. Meetings will take place in sandboxes. If we need to acquire the attention of a peer, we’ll just jingle some brightly-colored plastic keys in their general direction.

Once we’re done with another day’s work, we can enjoy a fine dinner, retiring to our very tall chairs with their removable trays. We’ll eat tabbouleh using plastic Care Bears cutlery. And, yes, we will finally be able to wear diapers without shame.

It’s going to get really weird, is what we’re saying. We should stop at the sippy-cup.

… And maybe the sandboxes.

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