Hazing
Screw Kappa Napa? I think that was the frat my dad was in…
Welcome to rush week, pledges! Over the next few days, we will be administering a series of “tests” to decide who we will admit into the fraternity of Screw Kappa Napa.
We’ve decided, this year, to forgo the traditional hazing methods. There will be no paddles, no streaking, no excessive drinking or eating, none of that. Instead, you will each be given a glass of 2009 Merlot. You will drink the glass, slowly, and then you will be given a quiz in which you will identify each aromatic note – the cinnamon stick, the black raspberry, the cardamom, the eucalyptus, all of it. From there you will move on to the flavors; if you leave a SINGLE ONE off your list – the coco nibs, the dried cherries, the red currant – you’ll be sent packing, understand?
Wait… did I just… Ugh! I always do this! I always give it away! Well fine, I guess we’re chugging expired milk and eating raw eggs. Again. Everyone grab a mug.
2009 Merlot 6-Pack
Complex aromas, such as cinnamon stick, black raspberry, cardamom, and eucalyptus, lead off this classically styled Merlot. Flavors of coco nibs, dried cherries, and red currant have a velvety roundness on the palate. In addition, hints of tea leaf and brambly berry notes give this Merlot further depth, along with moderate acidity and texture from a small percentage of Petite Sirah. Full-bodied with gripping tannins, this Merlot will appeal to traditional Merlot fans with its velvety berry flavors, as well as Cabernet drinkers with its depth and round tannins.
Open a bottle of this Merlot with a pan-roasted pork loin served with a balsamic reduction sauce, or polenta with mushroom ragu. A flourless chocolate cake would also be a perfect match for the richness of the dark berry flavors in this Merlot.
Rules and restrictions:
- Wine sold by winery
- You must be 21 or older to order
- Whoever receives the package must be 21 or older
- If you're drunk when the package shows up, you will not be allowed to receive it
- Wine cannot be delivered to a P.O. Box
- We highly recommend you use a business address as your shipping address
Thanks to stick-in-the-mud buzzkilling state legislators, wine may only be delivered to the following states:
- Arizona
- California
- Colorado
- Florida
- Georgia
- Idaho
- Illinois
- Iowa
- Minnesota
- Missouri
- New Hampshire
- New Mexico
- New York
- North Dakota
- Oregon
- South Carolina
- Texas
- Washington
- West Virginia
- Wyoming
If your state's not on the list, you're out of luck... for now. Keep up with the ever-changing laws over at ShipCompliantBlog.com, and/or sound the alarms with your state assembly person through FreeTheGrapes.org. Meanwhile, all Federal, state and local laws are complied with in providing this wine.
