Get dumped over the Holidays? Viciously? Like, invited you over to watch him hang the mistletoe above your sister kind of viciously? Or maybe it was one of those “Eh, you were ok while I was bored during October, but I really don’t want you to meet my family,” kind of breakups? Either way, I’m betting you’re pretty depressed.
Well, have no fear, if an adolescence wasted watching Lifetime Original Movies™ has taught me anything, it’s that the solution is chocolate and caramel. For instance, drizzling Le Caramel’s Caramel Cream over that disgusting quart of ice cream you’re shoveling down while sobbing along to She’s All That will reduce the depression content of that meal by exactly 26.875%. And Le Caramel’s Chocolate Cream is excellent for breaking streaks of obsessing over old text messages that have suddenly taken on a dark second meaning; who cares what he meant by “just gotta drop something off at a friend’s?” Who cares what he meant by “something” and “friend” or if what he was dropping off was merely the tattered remains of the love you shared? That chocolate is GOOD. And Le Caramel’s Chocolate Caramels are a perfect on-the-go depression suppressant. You may still be crying, but even if the tears drizzle down into your mouth, you won’t taste them through all that glorious chocolate.
So sure. Maybe you are going to die alone, and there really is a pretty good chance that no one will ever love you. But, hey, who needs love when you’ve got chocolate and caramel?
In the box:
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