“Yes, Christian,” you’ll say smugly, “you may have an 1811 Chateau d’Yquem… but is it SIGNED?”

What says you’re a music lover? Acetates and autographs. What says you’re a book collector? Leather-bound first editions and autographed copies. What says you’re a sports fan? Collectable game balls with- yeah, exactly. So how are you going to sit there and call yourself a wine lover when you don’t even own ONE autographed bottle? You’re not a true fan. You’re just a dilettante.

Okay, okay, stop crying, we’re sorry. We didn’t mean to be cruel. But you can see our point, can’t you? In this world where everyone has a relic of their heroes, you can’t just stop with a corkboard or frames for the empty bottles. You’ve got to have that one special wine, in a special place, so you can take it out and show it to people you want to impress. “See?” you can say to them as you blow off the dust. “It’s got JOHN HAWLEY’S NAME ON IT!”

You’ll get two bottles of the 2004 Hawley Merlot: one signed, one not. Open one and enjoy the black cherry, the currant, the chocolate and vanilla oak and the dark berry flavor that will only improve over the next five years. Stare at that autograph as you open the third bottle, the 2004 Cabernet Sauvignon. This one is rich and opulent and will also age well, but if you want to get at the cherry-berry tastes now, instead of waiting for that toasty vanilla oak of tomorrow, guess what? It’ll still work just fine!

But remember: save that extra Merlot. Even though we think you’ll find it delicious, we think you’ll like the taste of authenticity better. Because a signed bottle shows you know your stuff.

“Yes, one hundred and seventeen thousand was CERTAINLY a lot of money for a bottle… but take a look at mine… with the autograph on it. No, no, I’d never sell, how insulting to even ask! Any TRUE wine lover would have understood. Honestly, Christian, it’s like you don’t even understand this hobby sometimes.”

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