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Naked Winery "Hook Up" Muscat 4-Pack

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Ad Men

In a smoke filled room, three Madison Avenue ad men sit at one end of an oak conference table.

At the other end, a businessman sits. An older gentleman, he wears a meticulously pressed gray suit. He sits hunched, scowling across the table behind his tented fingers. Next to him sits a younger man: a wide-eyed and nervous assistant, or possibly his son - the patiently waiting inheritor of his father's legacy.

Opposite them sits a tall, v-chested man with chiseled features. He is Dan Dapper, creative lead and star ad man at the Starling Copper agency. He runs a pinky along the hairline of his slicked back raven mane before taking a long, deliberate pull on his cigarette. He nonchalantly exhales out the corner of his mouth, then crushes the remains of the cigarette in an oversized art deco ashtray before him on the table.

The mid-day light of Manhattan in August trickles in through horizontal blinds, causing the dying cigarette smoke to leap, almost imperceptibly from point to ascending point, like rungs on a ladder.

Dan stands, buttoning the top button of his suit coat. He shrugs, palms up.

"You sell wine," he says dismissively. "Wine sells itself. Right?"

The business man's expression in unchanged.

"What you want to sell is a feeling. But Nackley Winery? What does that say?"

The younger businessman pipes up. "Nackley Winery has been our name for four generations! When my great-grandfather founded this compa–" He is silenced as the older businessman raises one hand.

Dan continues. "Naked Winery." Dan begins to casually pace around the room. "It's whimsical. It's freeing. It's ..." He hangs his head and chuckles. "Sexy."

A drip of sweat rolls down the younger businessman's brow as he turns to the older businessman with a look of fear and concern.

Dan lifts a bottle sitting in the center of the table.

"Your signature Muscat? Hookup." There is the sound of uncomfortable shifting in seats. "Because like those brief episodes of intimacy, it's sweet, it's intoxicating ..." He pauses, staring off for a moment as his expression slackens. He is thinking of something else. "And as soon as the bottle is empty, it's gone."

Regaining his composure, he turns back to his audience, raising the bottle and gesturing to it with confident composure.  "Gentlemen, I give you Naked Winery Hookup Muscat."

The younger businessman swallows hard. His older compatriot slowly lowers his hands, palms to the table. His eyes close, and he nods, a faint smile thinning his lips.

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Features

2013 "Hook Up" Muscat, Rogue Valley Oregon 750ml 4-Pack

Hook Up is the perfect wine for any sweetie out there. Floral hints of orange peel and wild flowers tickle your senses and entice you. You can't help but want it. It's time for a Hook Up. Golden light yellow in color, orange blossom, orange peel, white flowers. Other variants of the grape produce lighter to darker wines depending on the hybrid and region, but all share that aromatic orange characteristic.

Vintner Voicemail
Owner/Winemaker David Barringer gives the scoop on his light, clean Muscat.

Specs

Muscat is the oldest known grape variety, most likely originated in Greece. Muscat existed as far back as the Ancient Greeks. It spread throughout the world as empires grew, through Egypt into South Africa, through Italy into the rest of Europe, through Australia via either South Africa or Europe, and lastly into the Americas by way of Spain.
 
  • pH: 3.44
  • Aging: 9 months in 100% stainless steel
  • Residual Sugar: 4.1%
  • Alcohol: 12%

Specs

Muscat is the oldest known grape variety, most likely originated in Greece. Muscat existed as far back as the Ancient Greeks. It spread throughout the world as empires grew, through Egypt into South Africa, through Italy into the rest of Europe, through Australia via either South Africa or Europe, and lastly into the Americas by way of Spain.
 
  • pH: 3.44
  • Aging: 9 months in 100% stainless steel
  • Residual Sugar: 4.1%
  • Alcohol: 12%

Vendor Details

Naked Winery

Owners:
The Barringer & Michalec Families
Location:
Hood River, OR

At Naked Winery we’re on a mission to cut America’s divorce rate in half by inviting couples to shut off the TV and share a glass of wine with each other nightly. Our philosophy is to produce premium class Oregon and Washington wines, with exotic brands and provocative back labels that are just a bit risqué. We aim to please the palate, change the conversation and enhance the romantic experience around wine. Drink what you like and remember that, “We Aim to Tease!”. In addition to our flagship brands Naked Winery and Oh! Orgasmic, we also offer Outdoor Vino, a wine that lets you “Take it Outside!” Packaged in a durable plastic bottle weighing in at only a fraction (1/6) of a traditional wine bottle, it’s reusable, recyclable and BPA-free, perfect for those looking for an outdoor adventure.

Our winemaking is focused on the fruit. We are blessed with beautiful berries and our job is to treat them with love, care and nurturing till they are in the bottle for your enjoyment. Our “Big” red varietals (Barbera, Cabernet, Merlot, Nebbiolo, Sangiovese, Tempranillo and Zinfandel) are orgasmically grown in the hot and dry Apple Gate and Columbia Valley regions of Oregon and Washington respectively.

While our food friendly varietals (Chardonnay, Muscat, Pinot Blanc/Gris/Noir and Riesling) benefit from the cool pacific marine layers of the Willamette and Rogue Valley's to produce subtle and complex wines. New American Oak is used judiciously develop bouquets that complement our “Bold” wines while mostly neutral French barrels provide complexity and layering for our fruit forward wines.

"Share a glass of wine tonight with someone you love!"  -Winemaker/Owner David Barringer

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
18m 39.882s

Purchaser Experience

  • 14% first woot
  • 3% second woot
  • 5% < 10 woots
  • 22% < 25 woots
  • 56% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 11% joined today
  • 0% one week old
  • 0% one month old
  • 5% one year old
  • 84% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 89% bought 1
  • 8% bought 2
  • 3% bought 3

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Naked Winery "Hook Up" Muscat (4)
$59.99 Sold Out Food, Beverages & Tobacco > Beverages > Wine
$59.99 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 3