Gentlemen and lady of the True Fabrications Board, we thank you for the opportunity to meet on this frosty afternoon. My colleagues and I realize you're the busiest professionals in the fabrications-of-things industry, and that is why we're so very eager to share our latest innovation with you.
Years ago, you lent us your faith, and in return we provided you with the Turtle Tumbler. You thought the technological journey ended there, but our passion never faltered. Six months later, we gave you the Lobster Goblet. The results were astounding, as we all anticipated, but we knew we could do even better. That's how the Flamingo Flagon came to be. Most organizations would rest on their laurels after that. But not us. You asked for more, and we delivered with the Ocelottle Bottle.
We've been working to perfect our vessels from the very beginning, and at last, we can stand before you today and say, "It is complete."
We give you: The Duckanter.*Roar of applause* *Tears streaming down cheeks* *Hats thrown in air*