... but you were delicious.
I wanna Rhone to yoooou.
Welcome, fellow adventurers, to the game of Winetopia.
I will be your Wine Master, and you will take on the "roles" of several intrepid wine varieties. Say hello to Kilgor the fierce Merlot, Q'Goran the roguish Chardonnay, and JanKris the necromancing Viognier. You must travel the blasted Paso Robles in search of treasure, experience, and magical flavor notes.
You wake up together in a strange room. There are no windows, and the air is thick and musty. A cellar, perhaps? A WINE cellar? Well, adventurers, what do you choose to do?
Yes, there is a heavy-bound door on one end of the room. Very well, who do you elect to break it down? Kilgor? Very well, roll a D20 for a strength check. Unfortunately, you are unable to bash down the door because you are a bottle of wine. Q'Goran tries to pick the lock on the door. But fails! His lack of limbs or opposable digits keeps him from accessing his lockpicks.
You hear something outside the door. Suddenly it opens, and a GIANT steps in. Standing nearly six feet tall, he towers over you. He grabs JanKris by the neck and tries to open her with his Wine Key+3. JanKris: roll a corking saving throw check. And…you fail. The giant drinks you and you are no more. Thanks for playing!