Sweet, sweet excess
I’m going to need more than four bottles of this Sauvignon Blanc.
Hey listen, I’d like to return this Sauvignon Blanc 4 pack. Well, yeah, of course the four bottles are empty! Did I say I had a problem with the wine itself? No, my problem was that I only got four of them, and unless I read something wrong, I believe I was promised twenty rows of 4 packs, so 80 bottles total. And since you didn’t make good, I’d like a full refund.
What were you thinking? You can’t just give me four bottles of this medium-bodied sauvignon blanc, with its flavors of succulent melon, ripe pear, and fresh lemon grass mingling together. I want acres of melon patches, whole orchards of ripe pears, field after field of lemon grass. Fresh lime peel? Subtle mineral quality? What about giving me enough bottles to make several whole lime rinds? Or a mine’s worth of mineral deposits? Yeah, I could taste the layers of honeysuckle and tangerine, but I want enough layers to build an entire tangerine and honeysuckle planet!
So, I’d like my 39.99 back now, unless, of course, you’d like to make good on your initial promise of the twenty rows…
2009 Twenty Rows Napa Valley Sauvignon Blanc
- Grapes Harvested in September
- Brix: 23.5%
- 500 Cases Produced
- Released May 1, 2010
- Blend: 100% Sauvignon Blanc
- Appellation: Napa, Pope Valley
- Fermentation: Temperature controlled stainless steel
- Alcohol: 13.4%
Succulent melon, ripe pear and fresh lemon grass mingle together in this medium-bodied Sauvignon Blanc. Fresh lime peel complements the subtle mineral quality while added layers of tangerine and honeysuckle round out this crisp, aromatic wine.
Rules and restrictions:
- Wine sold by winery
- You must be 21 or older to order
- Whoever receives the package must be 21 or older
- If you're drunk when the package shows up, you will not be allowed to receive it
- Wine cannot be delivered to a P.O. Box
- We highly recommend you use a business address as your shipping address
Thanks to stick-in-the-mud buzzkilling state legislators, wine may only be delivered to the following states:
- District Of Columbia
- New Hampshire
- New Mexico
- New York
- North Carolina
- North Dakota
- South Carolina
- West Virginia
If your state's not on the list, you're out of luck... for now. Keep up with the ever-changing laws over at ShipCompliantBlog.com, and/or sound the alarms with your state assembly person through FreeTheGrapes.org. Meanwhile, all Federal, state and local laws are complied with in providing this wine.