Shirt.Woot : One Shirt, No Shoes, No Service (SM)

In honor of that most drunken, celebratory of holidays, Make Your Own Luck starts out sitting pretty at the number two spot. The rest of the noobs head to the Danger Zone, along with Sullen. Behold a pale horse… continues its freefall towards the meat grinder, while two sekiyoku shirts cling to life near the back of the pack. Will a newcomer knock them off the list for good? You tell us: head over to the Reckoning page and purchase your favorites to keep them alive in the standings before the axe falls next Monday at midnight.

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BATTLEFIELD: KITCHEN!

As war rages across the buffet table, Tortilla’s finest strike back!

As Salsalist forces try to tighten their grip on the throats of liberty, a family size battalion strikes back. That’s right: over one pound of the saltiest, crunchiest chips, strips, and scoops Mother Tostito has born and bred are taking back every bowl and appetizer plate this side of the stove. Give ‘em hell, boys!

It’s tough going, to be sure, but in the end our boys fight for what’s right: liberty, justice, and equality for all! Those picante panzers don’t stand a chance against the free hearts and can-do spirit of our salted soldiers. And look here! Our friends from across the pond, the Frito boys, have heard the din raised by our honorable fight and answered the call! Chili cheese! BBQ! There’s room for one and all in this fight!

Remember, our boys need your help too! Ration all corn. It’s the only way to keep our soldiers in the fight! Avoid talking about the location of snacks. You never know who may be listening. And above all else: buy snack bonds!

Until we meet again: fight onward!

Wear this shirt: On an ocean steamer bound for glory halfway around the world.

Don’t wear this shirt: Around the chips and dip. People are going to assume you’re some sort of authority figure and start asking uncomfortable questions.

This shirt tells the world: “Went the Dip Well?”

We call this color: Roasted Red Pepper Menace

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It's Monday, and that means another seven shirts meet their untimely demise tonight at midnight. So long, Mug Shot, we thought you had the perfect amount of cuteness to be a lifer. Fare thee well, In Addition to Your Radishes, I will Take This; for what it's worth, we bought one. Procrastinate slips ever closer to the danger zone, too. Check out our Reckoning page to purchase your favorite almost-outta-here shirt designs. Today's the last day! And oh yeah, Happy 2nd Birthday, Nevermore!

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Fate did not smile upon these unfortunate entries from Derby #137: Luck. But rather than leave their lot to happenstance, we have appointed ourselves to rewrite their destinies with the mighty circumstance-bending power of the Honorable Mention...

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Big Love

The Affair That Destroyed San Francisco

Ah, it’s that time of year. Birds are singing, trees are budding, and a young monster’s fancy turns to thought of gettin’ it on. Yes, love is in the air.

What is it about springtime? The Earth wakes from her winterlong slumber, flowers push up out of the soil, and prehistoric mutant reptiles stir from their ocean-trench beds. Young people shed their cold-weather outerwear, exposing long-obscured sections of their skin to the sun, and strut through the streets in a mating season display, rousing dormant libidos as they parade.

Yeah, that’s one sure sign of spring: rampaging hormones.

Wear this shirt: while running right at the camera, screaming.

Don’t wear this shirt: in major cities that have been attacked by radioactive megafauna in the past ten years (TOO SOON).

This shirt tells the world: “I heart BBWs”

We call this color: Black Is The Color Of My True Love’s Fur

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Caught By A Falling Star

3rd place in Derby #137: Luck, with 739 votes!

I’ve been sounding the alarm for years: please, people, stop idolizing, romanticizing, and anthropomorphizing stars. They’re pitiless balls of flaming gas who would incinerate your entire species without a second thought. Or even a first thought. Giving them cute little faces? Singing them cute little songs? Using their name to honor the best cute little athletes? It’s a recipe for planetary suicide.

Stars may be necessary, but we must never relax our vigilance against them. They have their place, and it’s at least a few light years away. And whatever you do, never trust one with your social security number or Woot login info. Proxima Centauri is such a hotbed of identity theft, we won’t even ship there.

Wear this shirt: to share a hearty chuckle about the agonizing deaths of millions of living creatures.

Don’t wear this shirt: to the Cretaceous Period. Spoilers!!!

This shirt tells the world: “Live by the twinkle, die by the twinkle.”

We call this color: Blaxtinction.

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Ain't no party like a Nevermore party 'cause a Nevermore party don't stop! Seriously. It just goes on and on to the point where you start saying, "No, man, I just want to sleep in my own bed. I'll be fine. We can hang out tomorrow or something. Just let me go home." So while the raven stays in the mix forever more some other shirts are looking due for a hasty exit as they sit in the danger zone. You can help decide their fates by heading over to our Reckoning page and purchasing your favorites to try and keep them safe before the axe falls Monday. Don't forget to check out the Derby page, either. Your vote can mean the difference between that super awesome design you like (because you have great taste) getting printed and that stupid ugly one any self-respecting shirt wearer would never buy.

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“Aaaaah! Run for your li- Hey, a penny!”

2nd place in Derby #137: Luck, with 742 votes!

Roger? ROGER! What are you DOING?! The city is burning to the ground, we’ve got to get out of here! A PENNY?! Are you serious? That doesn’t change anything, Roger! A penny is not going to have any effect on the events unfolding here in the year 2012! I honestly think, in the grand scheme of things, it doesn’t change much.

Why are we even debating this?!

We have to get to that airfield so we can fly to China and try and sneak aboard those arks before they seal shut to endure the oncoming floods and earthquakes! To say nothing of the monsters and robots kicking around here.

Roger, we’ve got to leave before the fires- Hey, does the smoke seem like it’s clearing a little?

No, I’m sure it’s not related to the penny! That doesn't make any sense!

Wear this shirt: To the casino. Might as well put it to the test.

Don’t wear this shirt: During the apocalypse. You’ll probably want something with a little more protection.

This shirt tells the world: “Luck? Optimism? I don’t care to learn the difference.”

We call this color: It happens completely by Asphaltident

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In the upcoming year, our resolution is to get to know our community a little better. What you like, what you dislike, who you are. We've learned from talking to you, there's a lot to enjoy by meeting our community!

Two people in love is a beautiful thing. Two people entering into the tragic mistake holy sacrament of marriage is practically unbeatable. Which is why it was so noteworthy when forums member LuminousSpecter decided to propose to forums member socialhazardforhim on the set of the upcoming Narnia movie, Voyage Of The Dawn Treader. And as if that wasn't special enough, the couple were both wearing our shirts!

That's right, whatever happens from now on, we're responsible. We'll have ten questions with LuminousSpecter, a.k.a. Paul, right after the jump…

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Oh, Like You Haven’t Thought About Doing It

This is a much better idea than when I tried to get all those rabbit’s feet. Less messy, too.

I’ve tried everything. I shoved pepper up my nose until I sneezed three time before breakfast. I’ve picked up enough pennies to buy 157 items from a drive-thru dollar menu. I’ve ruined countless tablecloths spilling wine during toasts. I’ve even starting raising lady bugs in my backyard just to make sure that one lands on me every single day. And I don’t even want to get into how much neck pain I’ve given myself trying to look at the new moon over my right shoulder.

But this? This is my finest moment. Look out, Las Vegas. Mr. Lucky McLuckyperson is gonna take you by storm.

Wear this shirt: after a plush black cat has crossed your path.

Don’t wear this shirt: while watching the movie Leprechaun or any of its unnecessary sequels.

This shirt tells the world: “Hokey superstitions and ancient shillelaghs are no match for a good tape dispenser at your side, kid.”

We call this color: Bobby O’Brown

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